Well fast forward to that Thursday, as I packed for another Spartan race, my normal anxiety is in full force. There's more at stake at this one...more to be afraid of.
- It's half way into my Double Trifecta
- It's a team trip
- It's in Colorado=5500ft elevation, cold and mountains (scary for this Texas girl)
- It's at a Military base where Olympians train
My husband, as always, tries to calm me down. He's a great encourager but my fears often drown out his uplifting words. The more I pack, the more those voices creep in..."Can I do it...What about the elevation...How many obstacles will you overcome and/or fail...Can you finally get up that rope...Will you survive?!"
I know I can't continue to stress over it...It's too late; I'm already committed.
Forget about the cold
Forget about the elevation
Forget about the difficulty of the obstacles
Forget about trying to keep pace with others
FORGET ABOUT THE ROPE
Just cross the Finish Line.
Yes it was COLD (40degrees)
Yes it was TIRING
Yes it was DIFFICULT
But YES I MADE IT
I CROSSED THE FINISH LINE
Honestly the rest of the day and weekend was a blur.
However, I get it now. That small whisper last week trying to give me a hint of things to come. The success that I had longed for. That 'Light' was actually between 2 raging oceans. The first ocean was full of doubt...the " Will I ever...It's not possible...I'm not strong enough...I can'ts."
But then a there was a light...a spark...a catalyst to the next ocean. The ocean of full of confidence...the "It can happen...Anything is possible...I am a BEAST...I can!"
The lesson learned from my roller-coaster of emotions:
If you work through your anxiety and pain on the other side there is a reward. Use it to push you to greatness.