Saturday, May 31, 2014

Top 10 Things That Made Me Rethink Pool Day

So, my daughter had a sleep over and my husband and I come up with the bright idea of going to the pool. First, let me preface this to say that this an outdoor pool at our local gym...which means not only is it crowded, but there's a variety of people...all different shapes, sizes and ages.
As an avid people watcher with a serious case of A.D.D, this is a visual heaven for me. So what types of things did I see?!

• The kids that act like this is the first time they've ever been anywhere...obviously so because they are acting buck-wild!
•The puppy love couple that forgot that there's little children out here....obviously so because they are clearly touching each other inappropriately.
•The Life Guard that is more like Drill Sargeant or annoying hall monitor than a lifeguard....obviously so because every 5 seconds she's blowing her whistle.
•The parent that thinks it's funny to almost drown their kids...obviously so because the child is kicking, screaming and crying as the parent throws them in the deep end.
•The parent that thinks that floaties are babysitters...obviously so because as their child was drifting away, they were on their cell phone facing the opposite direction.
•The Daredevil 2 year old that thinks he's invincible just because he has a life jacket on...obviously so because the toddler gets a running start before diving in the pool like Evil Kanevil.
•The woman that forgot she was coming to the pool...obviously so because she's wearing two layers of makeup and every piece of jewelry she owns.
•The man that forgot it's 90+degrees outside...obviously so because he's wearing black jeans, blue long sleeve shirt with socks and tennis shoes. Oh AND a jacket!
•The wannabe model that mistook the pool for her personal photo shoot...obviously so because in between her walking back and forth (for no other purpose than thinking she was on the runway), she was taking selfies WITH THE DUCK LIPS!
•The hairy Italian stallion that has no concept of 'a little goes a long way'...obviously so because amidst the forest of hair he had on his chest, he must've rubbed a gallon of sunblock on...yea, it was white and greasy. Yuck.

We were there for 4 hours  and this is just the "Top Ten" folks!
The absolute worst thing I saw:
•The 12 year old in a Victoria Secret swimsuit. C'mon Mom&Dad, really?!
The absolute best thing I saw:
•The 8 month pregnant mom who was wearing an appropriately pretty and sassy swimsuit that swam and played with her adorably cute 4 year old.

So all and all, it was an interesting day. The girls had fun so that's all that matters...right?!  :) 

No comments:

Post a Comment